Download PDF I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t): Telling the Truth about Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power
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Jumat, 04 Maret 2011
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Download PDF I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t): Telling the Truth about Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power
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I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t): Telling the Truth about Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power
Download PDF I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t): Telling the Truth about Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power
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Product details
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Audible Audiobook
Listening Length: 10 hours and 44 minutes
Program Type: Audiobook
Version: Unabridged
Publisher: Audible Studios
Audible.com Release Date: December 16, 2010
Whispersync for Voice: Ready
Language: English, English
ASIN: B004GK3CNW
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
With over 700 reviews, why add one more? Because I think it is important to know that although the book is good, it has many, many anecdotes for mothers. If you aren't a mother, you may not identify much with the stories of shame. It took more over a week to read, and during that time, I kept finding myself in situations where I thought, "here I go again, shaming myself for not being perfect!" I thought that her book was poignant for me. However, I could have read and absorbed the book in 3 days if the references to motherhood had been deleted. I recommend Lucinda Bassett if you would like to learn more about shame and self-defeating thoughts. Ms. Bassett does write some anecdotes about her children and motherhood, but her message has wider appeal for women.
I've been intrigued with Brené Brown's work since I listened to her Ted Talk on Vulnerability. I finally got around to starting to read her books. I expected I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn't): Making the Journey from "What Will People Think?" to "I Am Enough" to be a reiteration of all the things I've heard her say in her talks and classes and in her interviews. It was that but it was also more. In fact, it was more than I expected or perhaps was ready for. I sat down intending to simply read the book and ended up deciding to take her advice and work through the exercises. I didn't always like the answers that arose for me, but it was worth the time it took. I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn't) pushed me to examine my thoughts and my attitudes toward shame and blame and vulnerability and strength. I started the book thinking that I'd already done this work, so this would just be me learning more about the topic. Brown breaks down shame and connection in ways that make her points highly relatable and highly relevant. As a writer, I found Brown's research also provides insight into writing characters who are mired in shame and those who aren't. I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn't) is a book based on research but written for every human, but particularly women and girls, who have ever been shamed into silence or into roles they didn't want to live.
This was the most influential of all her books, for me. I loved it. I think Brown's book's are best read in the order of Daring Greatly, I Thought It Was Just Me, and Rising Strong. Then, if you need the daily motivation and basic summary, The Gifts of Imperfection.
I wasn't ready to commit to opening up to a therapist, yet I really needed help. This changed my whole life, 5 years ago now. I had so much buried shame and it was choking me. So so so incredibly thankful for her research and the outlet it gave me. I can breath again, and I continue to make progress. I also learned how to set boundaries and be extremely comfortable with them. I didn't realize how much it cost me to never have had them- around my person, my family, my schedule, my heart. I think about B.I.G nearly every day of my life (boundaries Integrity Generosity)
I have cultivated shame my whole life, hiding and lying about the parts of myself I thought would repulse other people. I never understood what I was doing until I read Brene Brown's book in 2012. Being kind to myself and more genuine is still a work in progress but I have come a long way.This book is an essential read for anyone on the journey towards self-acceptance. I would recommend reading it in tandem with Byron Katie's book "I need your love, is that true?". With Brene Brown's book, you learn about the mechanics of shame, what your triggers are and how you behave when you have shame around certain issues. With Byron Katie's book, you learn to question the assumptions that drive your behavior (e.g. 'I need people's love and approval', 'I need to know that I am not alone', 'I need to know that other people have experienced similar feelings', 'if people know x about me, they will never love me'.)People are afraid to talk about dark emotions like shame, but I promise you, not doing this work is a million times harder. Speaking from my personal experience, self-exploration, with the help of authors like Brene Brown, has made me into a more peaceful person towards myself and towards other people.
I adore and respect Dr. Brown's research. However, I can't help but believe that she somehow is on a roll of redundancy. It reminds me other writers who over publish...Malcolm Gladwell, Wayne Dwyer, Deepak Chopra. If you've read one of their books you've read the most of their work.
I am 61 years old and carried shame through my whole life. I recently was able to realize the physical traits that occur when I am in shame. It was very, very powerful. With that realization the wanting to fight over the issue turned easily into empathy. I am amazed. I can only hope to have the experience again. I think it could be life changing for me.
Everyone should read this book. Understanding shame and how it effects everyone at so many levels has been eye opening. Learning how to be resilient to shame and learning how to speak about shame has been very impactful. I have also come to understand how to be more empathetic towards others and what it really means empathize, really listening and feeling the many emotions shame brings.
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